Recapping the wedding
Posted on July 29th, 2008
This is a bit long, so you'll need to go behind the cut to read the dirt.

Getting ready to go to the wedding was rather quick and easy. This was the second time we've been to a wedding at this estate, so we already knew the way and what to expect.

Once we arrived, we had little trouble finding where our relatives were gathered in the throng of people there. Despite there being 200 guests and thus a lot of people milling about talking, nobody could miss the voice of one of my aunts.

The next few minutes were spent chatting with the group; or rather the group listened to one of my uncles ramble on about cars.

Two trams showed up to ferry everyone up to the area where the ceremony was going to be held. Mom and I ended up on one tram while dad took the other. Our tram got there long before the other one did; it seems the battery was dying in that one.

While waiting for the ceremony we sat on some benches in the shade and people talked some more. Of course, when the ceremony began everyone but my dad and uncle shut up.

The ceremony was fairly simple, just a few exchanges of vows and a few prayers.

After the ceremony everyone filed into a common area with refreshments. There was an open bar that served mixed drinks, pop or just water. Mom asked for a virgin pina colada, but as bartenders didn't have any pineapple juice she changed her order to some ginger ale. I just got water.

Other refreshments were fruit slices, several kinds of crackers and three types of cubed cheese. One was pepperjack, another a mild cheddar and the last was a mild swiss.

As mom filled her dish with stuff, she excused herself for taking so much because she was getting snacks for both her and my dad. I piled my dish higher than hers, but I'm just hungry without an excuse. I accidentally plucked a cube pepperjack thinking it was the mild swiss, and so got a little surprise while eating. My parents and I also ate our snacks a distance away from the crowd.

After a short wait, everyone was herded into the main dining area. We were somewhat surprised to find that some of the tables were reserved for the husband's family. As we'd talked with the mother of the bride beforehand we were informed that there wouldn't be assigned seating. In the end we ended up sitting away from most of the relatives with the cousin that was married (and promptly divorced) last year and her current boyfriend. The DJ for this wedding was playing the music very loud -- you could barely hear what anyone was saying!

Shortly after everyone was seated, the wedding party gave a few speeches, and the wait to eat began. The dinner was setup buffet style and each table was released separately. Our table was the second to last table to go up and collect their dinner.

We talked as we ate. One of the interesting tidbits was that my cousin had been placed on one of the medications I'm on. This caused brain swelling, and thus she was taken off it very quickly.

Shortly after finishing the meal, my parents and I took our leave of the wedding. On the way back to the car the looming thunderstorm hit, drenching us.

That's the basics of what happened. The more specific remarks follow.

One of the oddities I noticed at the wedding was that the priest wore red vestments. In either practice I'm familiar with, red is not the color for weddings: white is the traditional liturgical color. I've no idea why he wore red.

Another oddity was that after exchanging the traditional vows both the bride and groom recited some other vows. The priest didn't echo any of this part. These last vows were bizarrely new agey; they were about "respecting Water" and Mother Nature and I think a few other elements. What the heck was that all about?!

Speaking of water, all of the women I saw that weren't relatives had a snowflake or crystal tattooed in blue on their left shoulder blade. This combined with the strange vows made me wonder if there's something cultish going on.

When everyone was waiting for the ceremony to begin, the woman next to me didn't speak English; everything she said was in another language. I think it was Spanish though dad said it was French.

And wouldn't you know it? Someone's cell phone rang during part of the ceremony.

I looked up information on my medication, as to be honest I took the brain swelling story with some salt. It turns out that when combined with another drug for the same condition it causes irreparable dain bramage. Yikes.

While waiting to be "released" to the buffet, I noticed that the caterers were the same group that catered the wedding I went to in 2005. This was not good news; last time I was told I'd taken enough, was hurried along and even told trays of food were "off limits", yet others could freely eat of them. The problem was I was "taking too much". Simply put, my computer's mouse is about the size of all of the food on my plate! It's no surprise that the first thing I did upon getting home that day was to fix something to eat. Obviously I wasn't thrilled with seeing him again. This time around mom asked about the oil used, as sunflower oil is becoming very popular and she's allergic to sunflowers. He barked the reply, so he didn't win points with her either.

However, he didn't stop me from actually getting a meal this round. I had 5 pieces of fried chicken, 2 rolls of roast beef, 2 potatoes and a sesame seed bun.

Also, the bride didn't recognize my parents and myself. Why did we bother coming then?

Lastly my parents noticed something interesting when they discussed the wedding later on. It seems there was some discrimination going on.

1. My aunt (mother of the bride) paid for and ran the wedding, per tradition.
2. She's said there would be no seating arrangement, yet there was and the arrangement prevented our family from sitting together.
3. When the wedding party made speeches, there was no mention of the bride's family at all.
4. The mother of the groom took the mic and made a speech: the mother of the bride did not.
5. In fact, none of the speakers were from our family
6. While the mother of the bride visited every table, the mother of the groom only visited the tables the groom's family were sitting at.
7. No attempt was made to mingle the two families.
8. There were 200 guests, yet only 17 of them were from the bride's family.

It does seem like our family were placed below the salt.

Hopefully that unlike Kate Holmes, the bride still has an identity of her own. It looks a bit unlikely.
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